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Re: First Sentences

Home / Forums / List of Forums / Young Adult / First Sentences / Re: First Sentences

#4451

Theresa
Participant

I love this and have to admit I’ve been lurking, but too scared to post. Well here goes:

Everyone knows that when life hands you lemons you make lemonade, but what happens when life straight up smacks you across the face?

I wasn’t sure if starting off with a question was best.

@Tracy- I think your sentence is great. It immediatley has the reader asking questions. The only thing I would suggest is taking out the word children it slows down the sentence. Toy kind of insinuates it’s for children anyway. That’s it though. I’d say it’s a keeper.

@Jenn- I love your sentence. My first thought: Why was she in a tower before and why is she back in one? It makes you want to read further.

@Heidi- I laughed when I read yours and if you can get the reader to laugh from the first sentence I wouldn’t change it.

@nefaerious: I like the first sentence of your prologue. It creates a visual. It seems kind of creepy and if that is what you are going for I would keep it.

@Laura- I like your first sentence. Short and to the point. Has me wondering who he is and why is he always there?