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Re: First Sentences: Revised

Home / Forums / List of Forums / Young Adult / First Sentences: Revised / Re: First Sentences: Revised

#4967

Tracy Rohlfing
Participant

@KsHippo8 I agree w/ Jani, Laura and Jessica. Maybe more of a “The blood trickled down the street like a river of rubies.” I do like the use of the word “rubies”

@jani I’m glad you’re leaving yours.

@Jessica I like the new one much better than the first. Now I know that Will isn’t just lagging behind, he’s reluctant because it’s dangerous.